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Dave Barry on Oscars

It's Oscar time -- prepare the blow darts! He has nailed it on the head. So, not much on TV...

It’s Oscar time -- prepare the blow darts! He has nailed it on the head. So, not much on TV this evening. From his column:


Yes, it will be 99 hours of nonstop entertainment, ''Hollywood-style,'' broken down as follows:
- Movie stars reading spontaneous banter from teleprompters: 6 hours, 37 minutes.
- Shots of the always fascinating Jack Nicholson sitting in the audience: 4 hours, 19 minutes.
- Jokes involving Enron: 1 hour.
- Memorable, unscripted moments: 3 minutes.
- People you never heard of thanking other people you never heard of: 87 hours.

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